The #@$*ing focal point of the #@$*ing parabola

Spent three long days in Vegas, but short version: everybody survived, marriages (present and future) intact, nobody arrested or unknowingly tattooed, even a little climbing was done.

More to come soon...

Vegas, baby, Vegas!: June 19-22

Desperate to get some sport climbing in before the official start of summer, Brian, Chloe, Joana, and I headed out to Vegas to check out Red Rock Canyon. We left on Friday afternoon, bypassing horrendous highway traffic with a daring cab ride through the mean streets of Brooklyn (complete with a gas station driver swap, Hasidim galore, and stunt driving). The flight was relatively uneventful, though we had to survive a particularly odorous airport bar and crazy patrons to finally land at our destination: Sin City, USA. We picked up our car and headed for the Stratosphere and our lovely pool-level room, complete with a scenic view of the parking garage. Wanting to turn in early, we dined at the fashionable International House of Pancakes down the street, thus introducing Chloe to the gastronomic splendor that is chicken-fried steak.

Still on NY time, we roused ourselves at 6 AM and headed out, passing bleary-eyed gamblers in the smoke-filled casino floor on the way out the door. After a stop at the local 7-11 (where Jojo was so desperate for caffeine she wanted it without water), a quick thirty minute drive brought us to the Red Rock Canyon national conservation area. With temps about to hit 100 F, our destination was the Black Corridor, which has shade until pretty much midday. The approach is a 20 minute scramble from the second pullout, down past a dry wash and over low sandstone formations, including a tricky circumnavigation of a tadpole-laden pool. The locals were clearly avoiding the heat, but a couple of climbers from Colorado were there when we arrived to rack and rope up. We spent the morning on an interesting bunch of 9's and 10's, with the 9's slabby to vertical and technical and the 10's juggy and overhanging. Brian kicked things off with a nice technical lead on Bonaire (5.9), fun but thoughtful on incut sandstone. Chloe and Joana followed to warm-up, while I headed over to Friend (5.10d), a juggy overhanging route with giant hueco handholds and no-hands rests, the crux being either a long sideways reach crux or getting over the bulge before the anchors. Not a bad choice for a warm-up giving the giant finger-friendly holds, but should have gone a little easier to warm up - Brian made full use of the holds as he re-led it to clean. Next Brian scoped out BonEZ (5.9+), similar climbing to Bonaire but a longer and slightly better route than its next door neighbor - after scoping it out on TR, both Joana and Chloe re-led this route! Nice show by the ladies... We finished up on Nightmare on Crude Street (5.10d), also a giant huecoed climb like Friend - a little wandering, with the climbing going left and right and the clipping requiring some non-intuitive sequencing. Great first day, and congrats all around: Brian coming out of the gate strong, Joana hitting the outdoor leads in style, and Chloe on her first lead ever.

Wake up! wake up! It's time to go climbing...

Morning caffeine is serious business




Chloe on BonEZ
B milking the no-hands rest

Jojo jughauling


Heading for the anchors on Nightmare

Not a bad first day!

We found respite from the heat at an Applebee's on the way back to the strip, where we discovered the glorious 2 for $20 deal (apparently, an appetizer and two entrees are supposed to be shared...). We stopped by Desert Rock Sports to pick up the new climbing guide by Handren, which is much more comprehensive than my old copy of Swain - highly recommended. After a little nap by the pool and a visit by B to his relatives, we took a quick trip to the Bellagio to do a little people watching before heading to bed.

Sunday called for warm weather as well, and we changed things up a little by heading to a lesser known spot - the Wake Up Wall, over in the Sandstone Quarry area. Despite a lot more cars in the parking area, when we got the wall - after getting slightly lost and bypassing the trail turnoff - we found it completely empty, as it would remain for the rest of the day. It's a beautiful spot, clean tan sandstone with a variety of routes from 8 up to 12 on a long wall and a flat bench top area on which to lay gear, lounge about, and heckle fellow climbers. We hit up five routes in succession, starting with Poundcake (5.8), a thought-provoking slab climb that was just a wee bit runout for my first-climb-of-the-day nerves. Next up was XTZ (5.9), listed quite accurately in the guide book as "an awkward grovel up the left-leaning chimney"; not a big fan of the offwidth, but it was a neat addition to the bag o' climbs. We then moved way down to the far right end of the cliff where Brian threw up a stellar onsight of Skidmark (5.10a), a fun longish climb with a mono, a devious pinch, high steps, and an overhanging bulge guarding the anchors. Chloe and Jojo both worked the climb on lead as well, while B and I went back to the left end of the cliff to find some overhanging stuff. First up was Mic's Master (5.10d), two bolts of slabby climbing before you launch into an overhanging jugfest with fun athletic moves; Handren has it at 10d but it felt a tad easier, which the fellows over at mountainproject seem to also believe. We finished the day by giving it a go on Just Shut Up and Climb (5.11a), slab to roof to steep jugs; eventually finished it off so we could get back my draws, but didn't have the mental strength or guts to pass the last bolt before clipping (which was clearly the right move in retrospect). Kinda runout to the first bolt (25 ft?) but I went through the lower first bolt of Mic's Master and backcleaned (wussy, I know). Awesome day, though, and an interesting variety of climbing in a beautiful and relatively breezy spot - lots of technical and crimpy 11s on the wall for a future trip...

Mmm... Poundcake for breakfast

The infamous desert bigfoot in his natural environs...

That's how offwidth makes me feel too!

Why over there? There's rock right here...
Brian leaves no Skidmark untouched

And they call Lohan firecrotch...

B heading up Mic's Master at the end of the day

We woke up early on Monday to get the most of our last day, rolling out of bed bleary eyed at 5:30. Looking to get in a variety of climbs, we headed back to the second pullout and the second level of the Black Corridor. Brian started things off in style on 757 2x4 (5.7), a leaning, long climb that wanders right and up, with some tricky moves getting off the ground. Chloe and Joana took turns leading this climb, while Brian and I scoped out other lines on the upper level. Joana gave me a solid belay up Lewd, Rude, and Misconstrued (5.9+), a fun arete climb that starts from a funky bench feature and has tricky corner moves to get up to the second bolt. There's a giant block roof halfway up that provides a rest in a cave, followed by easy, mellow moves up the off-vertical arete to the anchors. B then styled a ropegun lead up Black Gold (5.10b), which has a cruxy bouldery start to the first bolt; I clipped from a giant undercling down low but B moved past to a tenuous crimp before heading up and onsighting the rest of the route. Strong lead, especially given the deck potential at both the 2nd and 3rd bolts. I thought the opening crimpy moves to get the ledge above the first bolt were the hardest moves of the trip, definitely harder than any single sequence on the jug-bashing 11s we got on. Last but not least, we gave it a go on Rebel Without a Pause (5.11b), way back at the upper end of the corridor. Short but sweet and steep: 1 bolt on a ledge, then 3 bolts as you climb the steep face on solid holds that give way to smaller crimps up high. The crux move - left hand gaston crimp, right hand two finger undercling - stymied me at first but I eventually figured it out and gunned for the chains. Everybody worked it for a bit, way to finish the climbing up in style...

I got your "want some help with that rack?" right here...

Chloe by the numbers on 757 2x4

Lewd and misconstrued, perhaps, but definitely not rude...

Coming up into the sunshine on Black Gold

Trying not to pause on Rebel

Back at the hotel, JK used her considerable feminine wiles to score us an extra hour to check out. And of course, what Vegas trip would be complete without a revisit to gorge at Applebees, slot machine madness, and naked lady playing cards?

Why are you calling me Ted?

"Double down on this!"

What two-hour delay?